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Dave Barry
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The Vics

The Story:
Me and my brother went hunting for a few new victimes, and we thought wed found one. Untill the tables turned on us. . .

Rayovac: I am, sweetie
College12: hi
Rayovac: how are you?
Rayovac: ASL?
College12: 19
College12: m
College12: tx
College12: asl
Rayovac: why do you like the teenage mutant ninja turtles?
College12: there cool
College12: im a nerd
College12: *Nerdy Grin*
Rayovac: I see. 18/f/OK
Rayovac: lol
College12: mine name is Alex
Rayovac: My name is Alexa, go figure!
.....Long pause.......
Rayovac: Alex?
College12: yes
Rayovac: hm...what part of Texas do you live in?
College12: fort worth
Rayovac: I'm in Purcell, Oklahoma
College12: cool
College12: you have a boyfriend
Rayovac: well.....I have a girlfriend...were in the middle of a fight. her boyfriend came onto me, and I hit him for it.
College12: no more girlfreinds darling im your new boyfreind im hot and pretty just like a girl
Rayovac: Ooh...really?  This sounds good... I like pretty guys what about threesomes?
.....Long Pause.....

Rayovac: I guess you arent too crazy about that idea, eh?
College12: i am
College12: i love you
Rayovac:  awesome!
Rayovac:  what are you doing, baby? would you like me to call Amber over? She'd stop being mad for a while if I told her about you
College12: sure that sounds nice
Rayovac: she lives next door. Ill be right back
Rayovac: Hey baby, I hear you wanna be my girls new boyfriend...but if shes telling the truth about the threesome...I might not mind so much
College12: okay
College12: are yall hot
College12: hi im james alex brother
Rayovac: very hot, baby. Hey james. how old are you, baby?.
College12: 12 and im hot
Rayovac: twelve? Honey, Im sure you are hot, but Im not in the mood to go to jail again.
Rayovac: put your brother on
College12: i am alex
Rayovac: maybe hell show the chat tonight, if youre nice
Rayovac: he'll*
Rayovac: hey alex
College12: my name is james im 12 and im alex hes not real but i do have a like girls
Rayovac: oh. damn. well, thts okay. We were messing with you anyway. this is Skye and MD. Nice to meet you, James. 14/16
College12: but i do have a brother name alex and his 19
Rayovac: thats cool. would you like to join our club, where we mess with the heads of people? you could help us mess with your brother
College12: this is alex an f u your not messing with my fuckin head
Rayovac: LMFAO!
Rayovac: aww, wanna help us mess with someone elses, baby?
Rayovac: That was Skye, btw
Rayovac: MD= Orange Skye:Blue
Rayovac: heh
College12: your to young yall probably still throw shit at each other you little babies
Rayovac: fuck brother is fourteen, Im almost seventeen
College12james orange
Rayovac: lol Rock on, Little dude!
College12alex green
RayovacAlex good taste. Green second favourite colour
College12: nah im just fukin with yalls heads
Rayovac: if I didnt do the same thing, Id be pissed right now. who the fuck are you really?
Rayovac: Alex, James, Larry, Dick or tom?
College12: james is cool bring back those girls
Rayovac: lmao
Rayovac: u want them back, baby?
College12: yes
Rayovac: turn nineteen
College12: no
Rayovac:  then no girls
College12: okay babes im 19 and very hot like a princess
Rayovac: Oooh...really?Mmm......yeah, right, dude. youre not really nineteen, and were not really two chics. Im the hot chic, and the other chic sitting next to me is my fourteen year old brother.
College12: t
College12: tell him to get out
Rayovac: Smile, you're on Candid Messenger
Rayovac: kid,have been into the crack or something?
College12: tell him to leave the room the big people are talking
Rayovac: Hello....please do the math. 12 is TWO    years     YOUNGER    than      FOURTEEN    [14] .........  My brother is two years OLDER than you....
College12: i maybe 12 but in college cause im smart
Rayovac: well, youre education doesnt really matter here right now. Youre twelve, and Im NOT ready to go to jail for you, son.
College12: what do you think your gonna do with me i just whanted to be friends
College12: with benifits
College12: jk
Rayovac: Benifits? and what kind of benifits do you think we would have?
Rayovac: lol
Rayovac: funny
College12: that was alex
Rayovac: you mean, the brother that doesnt exist? or is Alex your other personality?
College12: my name is alox and i dont in fort worth i live in a small city outside of houston tx and im really 19 and i have a job
College12: live*
Rayovac: what job?
Rayovac: *prepares to test "Alox"*
College12: im a cashier at a craft and antique mall
College12: what about me james
Rayovac: hmm......bloody hell,lmao
Rayovac: so, theres two of you at your PC right now, aye?
College12: correct
College12: tell the truth about yourselves
Rayovac: I see. a few questions, first. what year were you born?
College12: 2 21 1986
Rayovac: what year was youre brother born?
College12: 9 22 1992
Rayovac: hmm *eyes computer screen suspisciously*
Rayovac: can you drive?
College12: yes but i have no d l
Rayovac: me niether. what kind of car do you drive? standard or automatic?
Rayovac: neither*
College12: autos standards are a pain in my arse
College12: what about me
Rayovac: alright, James. what grade are in and what are you learning right now?
Rayovac: are you in*
College12: 6th
Rayovac: what are you studying in history?
College12: sam houston an the gay alamo
Rayovac: alright, the truth about ourselves? what do you want to know?
College12: your ages
Rayovac: almost seventeen, and almost fifeteen. Im almost 17
College12: good bye
Rayovac: bye loser
Rayovac: youll be famous tomorrow
College12: why
Rayovac: you've been Fucked By MD and Skye, thats why
College12: cool
Rayovac: Youll be featured on our show tomorrow
College12: ive got to go to bed
College12: im tired its 108 in the morning
Rayovac: 1:16 over here
Rayovac: eight minute time difference! whoa dude! whats the past like?
College12: what channel are we gonna be on
Rayovac: its a Tripod channel channel, sometimes also on the Fanfiction Netweork
Rayovac: Network*
Rayovac: well send you the info sometime soon.... Well have to do a follow up skit, though
College12: when yall go to school tell your friends about us
College12 : are yall really hot or just ugly chewbacas
Rayovac: I told you, dude....My brother is NOT hot. and Im none of your business.

Names and screen names, and other identifying words have been changed to protect the victim from being furthur victimized.